When Thai time goes wrong

So at 6pm mid way through a foot spa and pedicure the school rings me to say the songthaew driver did not pick Tom and Claire up from school and the gardner will hang with them until I get there. (Yes this is 3 hours late) I ring the driver and the babysitter with a WTF, and dash like a demon to get them on the motorbike at peak hour, with one foot of toe nails red the other well not so red.

At school they are running amok, think its super cool they get to come home on the motor bike and no amount of cajoling them can persuade them to go to the babysitters for dinner so I can return to my already planned night out.

At the same time, Tom pisses his pants whilst sitting on the front of the motorbike and you know what spray is like for those of us sitting behind eg me and Claire.

So we get home and change Tom, I ring my brother to cancel dinner, we head downstairs to have a streetside fried rice and Mum an overdue consoling beer, when my friends who I had invited at last minute say they are on their way to the "real" restaurant.

FUCK FUCK FUCK!!!!

Tom by this stage had eaten his dinner, been picked up by a bar girl and moved next door to the Karaoke bar and asked them to take a beer out to Mum as their beer is much colder and far more delicious than the warm crap the restaurant serve from a quasi esky (well maybe he didn't say that but he did bring me an icy cold one)

Mum is still out on the road side stall losing patience with Claire who is picking at her food, and relieved to receive a beer. So in a moment of complete need she asks the karaoke bar if they can babysit the kids.

Claire chucks a whammy, Tom thinks its can of piss as he has the mic and full control of an almost empty bar.

Claire and I race home, jump back on the motorbike and head to dinner to meet Dad, brother and new friends.

20 minutes later, new friends call to say, we're at the pig restaurant and can't see us anywhere. They'd gone to a completely different restaurant. Oooops.

On return to get Tom I am persuaded to sing to a Thai bunch from a meagre selection of English songs and am not yet drunk enough to be witty or charming, so they whip out a ball of play dough, Tom knocks out Old Macdonald, Claire the Thai national anthem and me, well I'm chatting with the bar girls enjoying a cold beer

So, if I could have planned a lazy evening at home with a PG movie, dinner, bath and bed I would have, but things spiralled out of control and I've just done story time at 9.50. Please oh please someone of higher being make them sleep in tomorrow morning.

Circle of Cultures

Today has been a very busy day. We started early and went out to Ban Tawai a wood carving area in Chiang Mai. This was great as we picked up some very nice bedside lamps at a steal, a load of wooden toys and know where we can go for anything we might need if/when we move into a real house. From here the plan was to head to Dorklag's land, yet on the way we got completely lost and ended up at a temple watching a procession of offerings to do with Buddhist Lent. Families put baskets of everything together that they offer the monks who are confined to the temples for up to 3 months in hope they will look after lost ancestors. The kids thought this was great, I found it a little materialistic for a religious gathering. We ended up at Dorklag's land and did the cooked chook sandwich picnic thing as we fished and made sure our boat and Trev's home brew was all still in order. Good news on all parts except the gardener has not been in eons and everything is overgrown again. Tom got in his row boat and is pretty stable in it now, and able to almost get in and out without help now - this will be scary as he will go MIA I'm sure and we'll find him out in the middle of the lake. The beer is definitely doing the second stage fermentation as all the bottles are tight and in a new shape. The taste test will have to wait until they are chilled. We made it back home in time to see the Doggies Saints game on Australia network to realise it was a one sided affair, Tom asked if we could play cricket so we headed down to the grassy area beside the Ping. Claire in her girly way needed to do her hair before we left, Tom had to be told to get some pants on. But Tom is coming along in leaps and bounds in his motor skills. He may even be a lefty batter, but definitely a right handed bowler. And this brought us to Saturday night food, which we agreed we'd try a new place, so we went to a place I'd been to, but the kids haven't which is Pum Pui on the same road as the Top North Guest House. Kids were well behaved in the nice little garden restaurant we shared some pasta dishes and bread, Tom tried to share my carafe of red, but was convinced a lemon shake would be better and this was finished off with them being spoilt with gelato by the Thai staff and Claire breaking out in the Thai National Anthem with enough correct they understood what she was singing.

Please please please Thai teachers at school play repetitively at 8am some useful phrases over the loud speakers and Grandpa may soon get his translator.

Thailand Queen's Birthday Long Weekend

In Thailand the Queen's birthday is celebrated on August 12. The royals are so popular here it means that Mother's Day is celebrated on this day and there is also a public holiday. Tom and Claire go to a bilingual school, so this was a big event. The regular mother's day stall and fanfare prevailed as well as a concert performed on the 11th. I was fortunate enough to be working, so Trev and Annie went in my place and the video footage they returned with was painful. I did forewarn them that these events are never run on time and the pot luck lunch that we needed to take a plate for would be bedlem with some families taking enough food and others grossly undersupplying yet still heaping their plates full. This did occur and at one stage it seemed there might have been some nasty words spoken. The loud sound system that had been ear splitting for the past 3 hours gave up the ghost just as Tom and Claire's class was about to sing. Tom and Claire came home bearing funny little hats as part of their costumes and some unique mother's days cards.

It was also my first week of school with students and some colleagues Katherine and Garry invited us out to enjoy a pork knuckle. Yes, Trev and I are still not over our year where we lacked in the pork supply although I am pleased to say we are limiting ourselves in the pork crackle consumption on our daily market trips. They took us to a place called the Country Garden which ironically was the first restaurant we ever went to when we came here for our honeymoon ten years ago. The table was full of pork legs and towers of beer with good conversation flowing freely. It's the wet season here and the heavens did open on us just as it was time to motorbike home, although this did not ruin a fantastic night.

Thursday morning we awoke ready for our first Thai roadtrip. Annie and Trev had been tasked the research for this during the week and had come up with a north eastern loop to include Chiang Rai, Mae Sai border town, the Golden Triangle and Chiang Saen town of ruins. We also needed to include an elephant ride for tourist Annie and we were sure this would not be a problem at all.

The problem came though in the amount of beer consumed on the Wednesday night from the fun beer towers. The road to Mae Chan leaving Chiang Mai is a bit windy and I get car sick when I am healthy. So with Claire and Tom both asking for toilet stops before we'd even made it off the superhighway it was going to be a long slow 180km to Chiang Rai. First tourist stop was the San Kampheng hot springs. Tom had flaked it in the car just before we arrived, so it was up to Claire to enjoy hard boiling some eggs in the bubbling warm water. The smell of sulphur was doing nothing for mine or Annie's head or stomachs but we endured this. A little further up the hill we came across the welcome to Chiang Rai province banner which advertised 3 must see sites. Lucky for us the first was another hotspring labelled as the highest hot spring in Thailand. I was not sure if this meant the geist spurting out went the highest or its physical location above sea level was the highest. It didn't really matter Tom and Claire got to finish off cooking their hard boiled eggs, while us adults enjoyed some noodle soup and roti.

Back in the car we were almost through the first windy section of road and spirits began to soar. We passed a place called "Cabbages and Condoms" which was some kind of organisation promoting alternative crops to opium as well as family planning and HIV prevention. A few funny signs including the The Rubber Triangle rip off of the The Golden Triangle were essential. Our eyes were now firmly set on the Chiang Rai Winery as our next stop. This meant about a 10km drive off the main road and as we got nearer to the final destination we noticed a distinct lack of grape vines, yet an overwhelming supply of rice fields. So the speculation and laughter began on what we would actually find. The Chiang Rai winery turned out to be a very nice setting amongst lychee and mangosteen orchards and yes were were drinking fruit wine. The kids had a terrific time playing with the dogs that were lazing around the wine cellar and a good run to stretch their legs.

Back to the car for a bit more windy hilly country to take us almost into Chiang Rai, we stopped for the obligatory corn cobs from street side vendors and soon found ourselves a little outside Chiang Rai. On our left was the second must see tourist destination from the banner we passed a few hours ago. It was an amazing white sparkly temple. Being a public holiday it was packed, however mostly packed with locals not overseas tourists. Some parts were closed but apparently there are some images of the twin towers and Neo from the matrix which aren't terribly common in these places. Again a few funny pictures were taken of signs, Trev got some odd looks as he took a "how to wee properly" sign in the men's toilets.

And then it was into Chiang Rai. Any royal holiday normally means that bars do not open because it is forbidden to sell alcohol on these days. The guest house researched and chosen was closed so a back up plan was quickly devised and we ended up staying at Jansom's which was a clean and tidy place. Dinner was at the Night Bazarre a much smaller scale place than Chiang Mai but nice and comfy all the same.

Next morning we headed north for about 50km to the the Mae Sai border crossing. Trev needed a new visa and Annie wanted a new stamp in her passport. The kids and I are still waiting for my work permit to be processed so we left the two adventurers to walk the bridge into Myanmar and we headed for Doi Tung (which is still in Thailand). At the top of Doi Tung is a royal villa that the King's mum had built when she returned from Switzerland and she also left a legacy of environmental protection and reforestation. In 1988 Doi Tung was a barren hill after it had been over logged by the locals. The King's mum in her 70s and 80s rallied for the reforestation of this area and today it is an amazing lush rainforest. The north of Thailand is also well known for its opium poppies and drug related problems so in recent years a push has been underway to convince farmers there are other financial crops. Doi tung supports both coffee beans and macadamia nuts now.

Back to Mae Sai to pick up the world travellers and then on to the Golden Triangle. Signs in Thailand are mostly in Thai language with the major destinations and big towns being in the pinyin form of Thai. We followed the signs to the Opium Hall of the Golden Triangle and found ourselves on a very muddy and slippery detour. Big trucks were losing traction and at some stages were wondered if the little sedan were were in was going to make it. Always though a Thai driving a big cat would call us through telling us it was safe to continue. We arrived in the town Sop Pruek which is where Laos, Myanmar and Thailand meet. Some years ago Trev and I stayed in a fancy hotel so we revisited this just to see what the price was in the low season. The perk of the hotel was you could look over the river from your balcony or bathroom and see two other countries. It was insanely high for Thailand let alone in the low season so we continued on and chose to have a beer from a roadside vendor and do the same anyway. The weather was dismal and we headed on to Chiang Saen the town of the ruins for accommodation.

Chiang Saen is a not much town in good weather and in the rain is even more limited. We stayed at Gin's guest house which was comfortable enough but if you have the time I'd recommend seeing the ruins and keeping on going. We met a lovely dutch couple who were bicycling northern Thailand and some of Laos. I headed into town to pick up take away dinner and came back with a steamed fish inside a bamboo pole that had been in a charcoal fire, some corn, papaya salad, sam tom or it might be tom sam and rice (both sticky and plain) and greens with garlic. We had plenty of beer from the esky and sharing peculiar food and drinks is a good way to travel.

Next morning the kids were both up at sparrows, so Trev and I headed off for a quick drive before anything got going. A market stop and a coffee were needed and then we looked at the map for a destination for the day. We hear there are waterfalls and interesting places to visit in this area, although I am sure that this would be the case in good weather, but the mud and gunk were wearing thin. We headed back west to Mae Chan and then wound our way through some hills until we found an elephant park. Annie and the kids had a ride and then we stopped in at a few hill tribe places. Tom jumped around wearing a hat with bells all over it to the delight of the locals yet the appeal for us all was to head back to Chiang Rai and clean up.

We stayed again at Jamson's and then beelined back to Chiang Mai the next morning. No adults were suffering so the return leg was much quicker, although lil Claire may have experienced some queezy belly car syndrome so we stopped for a foot spa at the highest hot spring again and then down the last windy bit of road into Doi Saket. An afternoon at Dorklag's land near Doi Saket finished the long weekend with a bbq and Mae Sai plum wine.

Taman Negara

We just had a spur of the moment road trip to Taman Negara. After a year of coastal holidays we headed inland for the rainforest in search of some of Malaysia's great (tigers, elephants, tapirs, loris', wild pigs and mozzies). Unfortunately we managed only the wild pigs, free range chickens, one snake and a lot of insects.

As we are living in Kuantan we have our own car, so it was a 3 and half hour trip from Kuantan. Along the free way to KL, getting off at Termerloh and following signs to Jeruntut and then finally following signs to Kuala Tahun. If you are going by public transport you can bus or train to Jeruntut and then boat up the river for 3 hours to Kuala Tahun. As we drove we stopped at the bus terminal where there were a heap of accommodation signs and some hawkers anxiously looking to lure a tourist to their hostel. We mustn't have looked that inviting as no one approached us, and we didn't realise that the roadworks out the front of the school was blocking the way to the carpark of the tourist information centre.

Nevertheless we checked out a few places like Matt Leon village (looked great right in the forest and on the river but no one to take our money), then we headed down to the river and stopped at what looked to be a popular cafe. A friendly local lady pointed out the Mutiara across the river and said it was expensive, the the left across the river were some huts that she said were park ranger quarters and behind us at the top of a river rock hill were the cheap hostels, our kind of place.

We walked through a few and opted for TRV as it had some huts with fans and tables and chairs out the front with a bit of grass to set up the esky and let the kids run free. There were also some very relaxed locals in hammocks playing guitars which also suited us.

Our room cost 60RM and had a double bed on the bottom and a single bed bunk above, a ceiling fan, western loo and cold water shower. Late afternoon the shower was warm and to be honest it was sooooo humid that a cool shower was bliss. The first night we got carried away by mosquitoes and caught in a rainstorm, but after a day of travel and with two very excited kids playing flashlight in the hut we needed an early night.



The first sound of the morning were the roosters, followed by an apprentice destroying the "call to prayer" song over loud distorted speakers, shortly followed by Tom asking what's that sound to every boat he heard along the river all before the sun came up.

Breakfast was a delcious Roti Pisang (Banana pancake) and Teh O. Tom and Claire had a great time with the chef trying to stretch out the roti dough and counting in Bahasa as he cut the banana slices. A real nice icebreaker being able to speak the slightest amount of Bahasa.

After breaky we went across the river to what we had learnt was the "real" tourist centre in the Mutiara compound. We bought our national park tickets and camera licence and as we thought we were only going 1.5km to the Canopy Walk we declined a guide. The path was initially really easy with metal boardwalk type steps about 50cm above the rainforest floor, it then turned to mud and windy paths. The 1.5km turned into a 2 hour hike through all kinds of terrain and each time we were about to give up we saw another sign to the Titian Kanopi 1km further. Tom and Claire are 3 and half and were fantastic, they walked the whole way, we had to help at steep and slippery parts but at no stage were we lugging them on our backs.

Eventually we found a sign to the canopy that was 100m away, this was a rather steep climb up to a hanging suspension bridge kind of setup above the canopy. This was 5RM for adults and 3RM for kids and really worth the walk. It gave you a great appreciation for how old and tall the rainforest is. Instead of walking back to the Mutiara we found a sign to a jetty (jeti) and waited hoping we could hitch hike back to Kuala Tahun. We weren't the only ones with this thought in mind and although we didn't have guide we quickly flagged down a boat and negotiated our way back.

That afternoon we did another tour which included rapids and swimming. This was 30RM for adults and lasted an hour and 15min. We went up river over 6 or so rapids and stopped at a nice river beach for a swim. Sma our boat driver was super friendly and we watched as he swung tarzan style from a Lianna tree limb. The kids had a great time swimming with just their bubble backs. In different seasons I guess you can sit in tubes and drift down the river but this was not available.

Along the river at Kuala Tahun are about 7 or 8 pontoon restaurants and mini marts. LBK is where we booked our boat ride from, but I would not recommend the food. The one directly opposite Mutiara is the most populated and this led us to a false sense that the food would be good too, unfortunately the number of people was too many for the poor kitchen hand and food here was not great. Our best meal was at the Nusa ...... pontoon.

Taman Negara and Kuala Tahun are really in indigenous Malay areas. So food is halal and alcohol, well we didn't come across any. We took an esky with beers and had these back out at the front of our hut at TRV, but ice could not be found to keep them cold over a number of days.

Overall Taman Negara was good to visit, I would say 2 nights is plenty unless you are planning on hiking out to a hide to camp the night. I wouldn't be in a hurry to head back and if you are going for the wild life I'd consider Borneo for a better chance of seeing any.